okay, don't feel that its just been this place that i have neglected, i've neglected my day to day blog also.

soooo...what's been going on since i've last posted. been busy of course, but i won't bore you will all those details over here. you can go check that out here.



this is the current weight and i'm fuckin' ecstatic about it. i'm so close to 150 i can't even stand it. i'm hoping that once i'm off my period and all the bloating is gone that i will be even closer to it.

for all of you out there reading (is there anyone still out there???) and struggle with their weight and get extremely frustrated with the up and down of it, i hope you have seen since i started this blog that its not just you, its EVERYONE!!!!

i started this blog in january and i have lost a grand total of five pounds.

now as we all know, i've lost over 35+ since last year and when you get skinner, the pounds come off a lot slower, but i know that these five pounds i have lost are gone forever.

so i really am happy with the lil bit...strike that...huge amount of progress that i have made. what also makes me happy about this is knowing that once i reach the main goal i will be able to maintain.

i have been trying to drink more water and have been watching what i have been putting in my mouth, however, i am allowing myself to pretty much eat something bad when i want it. i also started tae bo the other day. i'm hoping that will tone me up in areas that i am really trying to focus on (back fat, belly, and waist).

with that being said, here's a (bad) shot of my newly loved body. do i still see problem areas in this pic, yes, but do i see a lot of things that i love...hell yeah!

esp. the fact that these are a size 12 pants and they are pretty loose on me and the shirt is a friggin' medium. i can't even tell ya the last time i wore a medium anything.

i only wish that i would have taken weekly shots of my body from the beginning. oh well, too late now.



how is everyone else doing????

so since i am home today i decided to make me a yummy lunch.

i love egg salad and have managed to find a way to eat it without going on calorie and fat overload.

first only use egg whites and maybe one yolk. today i used five eggs, four egg whites and one egg yolk. still turns out yummy.

fat free mayo and dijon mustard are a mustard. you would not believe the kick the mustard gives it.

salt, pepper, and onion powder (since i didn't have onions).

voila...egg salad!

toasted whole wheat english muffins, topped with egg salad, then with fresh spinach and tomatoes.

complete with two mini dill pickles and baked lays.

oh and don't forget the diet cherry vanilla dr. pepper.

yum!

there's also enough left over to take withme to work one day this week.

what have ya'll been eating for lunch?

well, an almost week of not weighing myself (okay, so i cheated once and weighed myself yesterday. i know, i should be ashamed of myself ;) resulted in this.

i'm pretty excited about it. another pound down. five more to get under 150.

i think i can. i think i can. i think i can.
i know i can. i know i can. i know i can.

yesterday upon finding a gc for lowes in my wallet i went there to finally get a full length mirror. i haven't seen my legs and a good shot of my ass in a looong time. not b/c i didn't want to but b/c i always forget to get a mirror at the store.

so this morning upon standing in front of this mirror, butt ass neked, i started to look at my body. really look at my body. now most of the time when i look, i look for all the problem spots. lower belly hanging from 2 c-sections, arms could using a lil toning, blah blah.

but today, i looked for the good things. the wonderful improvments then i have made with 34 pounds off my body. this made me think. why am i constantly wanting to see the bad things about my body? why do i do that to myself? why do i let my hubby tell me how beautiful i am and how much he *loves* my ass to turn around and tell him that he has to say these things b/c he's my hubby? why do i doubt why men in public are beginning to look at me? (this is not meant to be vain, it actually makes me uncomfortable b/c i think they are looking b/c something is wrong. i know huh...get some self esteem girl!).

why can't i just see the beauty in myself?

so with that said, i am going to try on a regular basis to focus on at least one beautiful thing about myself. whether it be inside or out.

i'm starting today and ask you to do the same.

tell me three thing about yourself that you love. that you really truly love. i also encourage you to post them on your blog. one day when you are feeling a lil down and out, i want you to find that post and read just a few of the things that make you the beautiful person that you are.

i'll start:

1. i love my eyes. my eyes are this amazing "toad color". "toad" you ask? well they are these dark olive green color with brown flecks all over the place. they turn a brighter shade of green when i have been drinking a lot (whooo-haaa) or if i have been crying a lot. some may call that hazel, i call it "toad".

2. my collar bone. since losing all this weight, you can actually see it. i love touching it along with the upper part of my chest (before you get all kinky, i'm talking about the area under my neck and before my hoots). this used to be such a fleshy/chubby area and now its flat and has definition to it.

3. my imagination. i love that i have such a vivid and wild imagination. i have been like this all my love and its something that i am glad that i have passed on to my kiddos. i think imagination is everything and i'm glad that i have it.

okay, now its your turn.

okay, so far i haven't weighed myself since yesterday at lunch. i think thats quite the accomplishment since i am dying to hop on. but i'm hoping that weighing only on tuesday's will show more signs of improvement.

i also haven't had candy in...hold on lemme count...52 hours. wow! i think its the longest i have ever gone without a piece of candy (aside from a mint or a piece of gum). i'm hoping this helps too!

i'm thinking of picking up this and
this for both me and the kids (well mostly me...lol).

as some of you could prolly tell from yesterday's post, this is very important to me and i plan to read a lot on their website. everytime i see the commercial for this i get all teary-eyed. i don't want my daughter at the age of 7 feel that she needs to be on a diet. how has this happened???

anyway, before i get on my soapbox and get all teary-eyed just thinking about it, i'm going to go. but i encourage each of you to check it out. especially if you are anything like me and have dealt/are still dealing with low self esteem.

oh, and today's lil blip of encouragement:

get rid of all clothes that don't fit. wearing tight clothing only emphasizes to yourself how "not right" your body is.

okay, just so you didn't think that i forgot all about this week's weigh in (tuesday was mardi gras and i was off of work so my a.m. routine was messed up. wednesday i weighed and the picture turned out like shit. but rest assured. today's weigh in is the same as wednesday's).

i'm really frustrated with this b/c i can't seem to escaped this range in the 150's.

i'm hoping that next week is a week of improvement. i mean no candy for a week and a buncha water should do the trick.

i swear, i think i went to the bathroom at work over ten times today. i hardly go ten times in a week :)

I know that I have said before that I am addicted to weighing myself, but I don’t think that I have really admitted on here how addicted I am to it.

Seriously, there should be a support group for me. I weigh myself on an average of five plus times a day. Did you hear me? Five friggin’ times a day.

That is insane. There is no need for it.

How it started was last year, when I decided to take this weightloss challenge, I really didn’t want to be tied down to points. I knew how weight watchers worked and had learned at this point a good estimate of how much points were in something by looking at it. I wanted to change my eating style, not constantly worrying about points.

So everyday was a journey. I watched what I ate. Made healthier choices but ate what I want in a smaller portion if I wanted something. I also drank an assload of water. So not knowing if this was going to work or not, I started to weight myself every morning to see if it was working. I figured that if I waited a week or so to weigh and it didn’t work, then I was wasting a week of going on weight watchers if that was what I was going to have to do. Seriously, how stupid does that sound?

I noticed that the weight was coming off on a daily/bi-daily basis and that is how the cycle began. Now there were times when I didn’t/couldn’t weigh myself on a daily basis (take hurricane Katrina for example) but after things got back to “normal” I fell off the wagon and started this ridiculous cycle of daily weigh-ins.

This is pretty much how it goes:

1. weigh myself when I first wake up, naked, and before I get in the shower.
2. weigh myself again after I go to the “bathroom”. Again naked.
3. if I don’t like that number, I usually weight a lil bit again and weigh myself.
4. weigh myself once I get home.
5. weigh myself after dinner and before I go to bed.

Now this is on any given day and sometimes there are more times then this.

I mean as I sit back and look at what I just typed, I’m extremely embarrassed. Is this really something that I want the world to see? Is it something that I am willing to admit and try to overcome? I mean I am beginning to wonder if this is slowing my process down.

I know I haven’t posted a pic of this week’s weigh in (I will once I get home tonight though) but I can tell you know that it is a + 0.5 lb. From last week. I am constantly hovering anywhere from 156-154.5. I don’t know what to do to get past that and now I really am wondering if hoppin’ on that scale so much is slowing my efforts down. I really wanna wait until next Tuesday before I weigh myself again, but I am so afraid that not weighing myself everyday will cause me to be slack.

Is this stupid or what? Can anyone out there relate to this?

On a quick side note, I am hoping that one thing that will help me get outta that 156-154.5 death zone is the fact that I gave up candy for lent. Now, don’t go thinking that I am this big religious person b/c I am far from that. Actually I have a bet going with someone at work to see if we can go without something for the forty days. His is cussin’, my is candy. I haven’t made it thru the first 24 hours yet and I’m jones-in’. I’m hoping that this will help.



edited to add: when i got home today, i had a great lil pamphlet from dove with coupons, advertisements for a couple of their new products, and a lil bit of inspiration.

this was one of the lil pieces of inspiration that i thought was so appropriate based on this post today:

scales belong on a fish. try to wean yourself off the scales. too many people allow the scales to dictate how their life is going to be.

how wonderful is that????

you can also go here for more self-esteem exercises and tips.

whats this you ask? a whole new wardrobe? i wish. its all the clothes that i have outgrown (or is it undergrown??? hmmmm)

anyway, they are too friggin' big for me so outta the house they go. i am so excited about how big the piles are. i tried every single thing in my closet on. if it didn't fit or didn't look right, out it went. i'm pleased to say that all the clothes are gone b/c they were just way too big. i am happy though that they are headed to a new owner....my dear friend amy who has recently started weight watchers and she herself has lost a grand total of 15 pounds.

way to go amy!!!

if you've visited my other blog you would already know that i am off work today for mardi gras. so i didn't think about the fact that today was weigh in day when i woke up. so i will post tomorrow. however, i'm not counting on much. since this past weekend was a bday weekend, it was filled with all sorts of yummies. but i don't mind. i def. wasn't going to deprive myself on my bday.

how is everyone else doing?

FINALLY!!! signs of improvement around here...lol.

not bad considering that aunt flo has been a bad house guest and extended her visit. not to mention all the extra baggage she brought with her: bloating, irritability, hunger. what a bitch she is.

i really haven't done anything different this week. tried to drink more water. i seem to go thru spurts. today i may drink and assload and then tomorrow i'm busy at work or something and i hardly drink 8 ounces. i am going to have to be better at that.

i have noticed though that my body requires me to eat. meaning, i can't skip a meal. i'm beginning to think that i need to eat five-six small meals every day. i've noticed that i seem to lose weight when that happens.

i have not been exercising at all. this disappoints myself, but i have been so friggin' busy. i know what you're thinking, "you have to make time for it". i can't seem to make time to pay my bills much less take an hour outta my day to exercise. i'm hoping that in the next week or so things will calm down.

ha! who am i kidding, we are going to start the build of our house in the next couple of weeks.

anyway, i hope that you guys are having much success and i am going to try my damnest to post here more often.

i have gotten great support from you guys and a few have expressed how much they enjoy visiting here. i mean who wouldn't wanna stop by and see a picture of a strangers scale and all her ballsy-ness by posting her weight on the web :)

i don't FUCKING get it. no progress in the past week??? are you kidding me? what is going on here? i have turned in to a camel with the amount of water that i have consumed in the past week. i have tried my damnest to watch what i eat.

my pants are starting to fall off of me (including those size 12's i bought the other day) and i can look at my stomach and tell its not as "bloated" looking.

so what gives?

okay, so now its time to re-evaluate some things. i need to do a lil research and i will get back with ya'll (plus, it have to run to work).

its official.

i am now a size.......12!!!!

this is an amazing feat. i have now lost 3 pant sizes. whoooo-haaa!

it all started this morning when i tried on a pair of size 12 pants that greta had given me when then became too big for her. when she had first given them too me, i think i could button them, but they were extremely tight. this morning they fit. of course i had to call mike and have him give me the "ass low down".

whats the "ass low down" you ask? well, its when i ask him if it looks like my ass is eating my pants. so i got the approval for em and headed out to do all our errands today. throughout the day i kept thinking "holy shit, i'm in a 12".

some amongst all of our running around, we headed to the gap to find some clothes for the kids. i found the most amazing mint colored green pants. i stood there and debated between the 14 and the 12. we didn't have time for me to try them on and i didn't know if i should just get the 14 b/c that is what i'm used to or what. so i went with the 12.

i just tried them on and they fit beautifully. i mean b.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l.l.y!!! there was in room in them. ran into the kitchen, hoopin' and hollerin that they fit, and have mike give me the "ass low down" again.

all good!!!

i can't even believe that the next size that i could be in is a 10.

wow!

well, this is defineately a situation where its one step forward, two steps back.

i actually shouldn't complain. this is nothing like i thought it would be. i expected a 1-2 lb. gain after the gorging i did saturday night and ALL DAY SUNDAY (and lets not forget those fuckin' dots).

so a lesson learned right? and now i know to stay away from the dots and drink more water this week.

lets hope for a better weigh in next tuesday!



and how is everyone else doing?

this is why i don't expect tomorrow's weigh in to be a good one.

i've talked before about my addiction to candy (hello, my name is elizabeth and i am addicted to all fruity, sugary candies). well, while talking to greta about my fear of posting a picture of a scale that shows a weight gain, she asked the simple question "how many ww (weight watchers) points are they?"

well hell if i knew. i mean all i knew was that i can finish a box in less then 24 hrs. so i came home and did the math.

holy shit!!!

17 pts. a box!!!!

that is almost how many points i am supposed to consume in a whole day. i can have 3 1/2 hershey candy bars for that amount.

that was a huge slap in the face. dots are no longer my friend.

i can't believe it! i really can't believe it!!!

i have to admit, that i still have been weighing myself every day (more on that later though...i'm addicted...its sad) and i didn't expect the number to be that low this a.m. especially since i am still bloated like all get out and i haven't been drinking that much water the past couple of days.

am i complaining?

hell no!!!

deep sigh!

now that the first "weigh in" is officially over, i can relax and get excited about what next tuesday's post is going to be like!!

am i wrong in thinking that not only would this be good for the body, but good for the bedroom ;)

well tomorrow is the big day!!!

eeeeek...i'm a lil nervous.

i don't have much to report on the food front. i've had a bit of a stomach issue today (a lil tmi i know) so i have been trying to avoid eating much of anything, which includes not drinking as much water as i would have liked.

ya know, i read an interesting article yesterday here about how everyone has that part of the day where they just wanna nosh and that really during that noshing time, you only need to consume 100 calories.

so that got me thinking....how much is out there that is 100 calories or less and is enough to keep you full. here are a few snacky things that i have come up with so far (note: this excludes fruits and veggies. i am a firm believer in eating as much fruits and veggies as you want):

1 slice of wheat bread (40 cal)
1 slice of 2% kraft cheese (50 cal)
1 2% reduced fat cheese stick (90 cal)
mini kosher dill pickles (5 cal)
1 snack size reeses peanut butter cup (80 cal)
1/2 box of cracker jacks (60 cal)
1/2 cup veggie/beef campbell's soup (80 cal..add water to this and it would be
more filling and more than 1/2 a cup)
8 reduced fat vanilla wafers (110 cal)
1/2 cup sugar free/fat free pudding made with skim milk (70 cal)
1 full sheet graham cracker (60 cal)
1 slice fat free bologna (20 cal)
1 turkey hotdog (70 cal)
1 c. skim milk (90 cal)
2 sugar free fudgesicles (80) THATS RIGHT FOLKS, I SAID 2!!!!
1 T. peanutbutter (95 cal)

now what 100 or less calorie items do you have hiding in your cabinets?? and when is your nosh time???

this was this a.m's breakfast and one of my favorites might i add.

here's the breakdown:

samich

2 eggwhites sprinkled with zatarans (cajun seasoning). (i froze the yokes for other recipes)

1 slice of 2% kraft cheese

2 slices of natures own healthline double fiber wheat bread

2 morningstar farms veggie sausage patties (i'm addicted to veggie products. more about that in another post)

fruit salad

just some bananas and strawberries thrown into a bowl with a lil fat free coolwhip and some chopped walnuts.

reduced sugar/calorie + calcium oj

yum! this really kept me full till after one o'clock.

now lunch was simple

fat free bologna and 2% kraft cheese sandwich on same bread listed above (okay, i don't give a shit as to whats in bologna...i love it).

pretzels

lil pickle

and a small bowl of sugar free/fat free chocolate fudge instant pudding.

oh, and some diet cherry vanilla dr. pepper.

yum!

what have ya'll been eating?

ya know, most people have a sweet tooth.

i have a mouth full of sweet teeth!

i am a candy whore!!! i have always loved candy. ahh...the tasty jujy fruits, the chewy dots, the wonderful twizzler, the rainbow delight of skittles, the original fruit love called starburts, the jolly jelly bean.

i love them all. this is why i need to lose 10 more pounds...lol. candy is my downfall. i'm not much of a chocolate girl (except for those orgasmic truffles), but i could seriously stick my face in a vat of sour patch kids and not come up until every last sugar granuale is gone.

so if you are a candy whore too, hopefully these lil pointers will help ya out.

*miniature is the way to go!!! you get to curb the craving and eating a small bag and finishing it is a lot better than finishing a whole friggin' huge bag of m&ms.

*freeze your miniature candy bars. that way when you eat them, it takes a lil bit longer to eat and you feel like you ate more.

*the above also applies to gummy worms!

*3 musketeers and york peppermint patties are the way to go when you are wanting something chocolate-y.

*jolly ranchers!!! seriously after you suck on a cherry jolly rancher, usually that sweet tooth craving is gone.

*sugar free, fat free jello instant pudding! can you say yum. i usually whip some up, add a lil bit of fat free coolwhip to it, and voila, a sweet treat!

*reduced fat vanilla wafers and graham crackers.

*skinny cows. OH.MY.GOD!!! you guys seriously have to try these. the icecream sandwiches are to die for and you never woulda thought that they were like 97% fat free. they have em at walmart (and i think winn dixie, not sure). seriously though, check your grocer's freezer (do i sound like a commercial?)

*speaking of icecream sandwiches, take a chocolate graham cracker, break it in half, top the half with a lil fat free coolwhip, put another cracker half on it, pop it in the freezer, wait until it hardens, and then eat. this is also good without putting it in the freezer.

*pumpkin fluff

1 can of pumpkin
1 pkg. of vanilla sugar free/fat free pudding
fat free coolwhip
pumpkin pie spice

whip together the pumpkin, pudding, and pumpkin pie spice until mixed. add the coolwhip and put in the fridge for about 10-15 minutes.

eat the yummiest pumpkin mousse you have ever had.

*chocolate milk-i use skim milk with some hershey's chocolate.

*fresh fruit. pick your favorite fruit and eat to your heart's content. i mean seriously, how can you go wrong with fruit.

*chocolate covered strawberries. there really isn't that much chocolate on them.

*homemade fruit smoothies. throw some skim milk, fruit, and some fat free yogurt in a blender.

*the last tip for the night is to enduldge. one thing i have learned on my weightloss journeys is that if you don't allow yourself to have something that you really want, that "thing" is going to call your name all night until you can't take it anymore, and then its 3 o'clock in the a.m. and your sitting on your kitchen floor finishing off a box of ho-hos.

so if you allow yourself to have it the minute you want it and have just a lil bit of it, then the craving will be gone and you will still be on track.

now, what tips do you have to curb that sweet tooth?

not much to report in the past couple of days except i have been exhausted!

i did walk on monday or tuesday (i can't remember) and this afternoon in my soon to be neighborhood. i absolutely love it there. park my car on my piece of land, do a lil stretches, turn on the ipod, and get to moving.

as far as diet goes, i have noticed that i have watched the amount of food i have been eating this week and what i have been eating (which is a feat considering its that wonderful time of the month).

i also have been drinking a lot more water (yeah for fifty trips to the bathroom a day!!!).

i'm a lil nervous about my first weigh in post, but as long as i lose 0.5lb. i will be happy.

i hope to post a couple of recipes for ya'll this weekend.

welcome to the journey of me losing those last damn ten pounds.

here's a lil history about me and my arch enemy "ms.extra weight":

my body has always been an issue for me and i really wish it wasn't. i have always been chubby and in my younger years, i had to deal with being as flat as a board also (not a fun combination). thank god i woke up one day in the 9th grade and looked down and saw this rack that i love so much :)

i don't really recall dieting or anything like that in highschool (however, as all highschoolers know, my body image was not a good one), but once out of school, it was more of an issue. probably b/c i was really beginning to start to gain a few lbs. (and had a doctor tell me i was obese. i am 5'4 and weighed 150 lbs.) of course once i had mikey, i had thrown in the towel. now my body was completely different and i was completely unhappy with it.

i then got pregnant again (completely planned, completely took us forever to get preggers) that i ended up losing. at that point i think i needed something to focus on to take my mind off it. so doing weight watchers was what i was going to do. i didn't go to any meetings or anything. i was just going to figure out how many points each food item was (i had had a previous relationship with weightwatchers about two years back but had just gotten off track). i used their messageboards for support. i jotted down everything thing that passed my lips, walked with my mom, drank enough water to fill an ocean, and really started to lose some weight.

then i got pregnant with bella (another pregnancy that took forever and actually happened in a month that we didn't try ;). now for those of you with lil girls, you may be able to relate. you carry a girl completely different then a boy. with mikey i was all belly and it stuck out. with bella, i was all ass, hips, and belly and i was spread from side to side like the front of a house.

so needless to say, i had even more places to work on.

i hit my all time high the end of 2004 when i weighed about 190. i couldn't believe the scale when i stepped on it.

190?!?!?

how did this happen to me?

could it just be the holidays? probably not.

am i just a lil bloated? nah

is the scale broke? not bloody likey

was i outta control with my candy/junk food addiction? now you're talkin' sista.

so i had decided that since mike was leaving for the forensic academy in knoxville in january 2005 and i wouldn't be able to see him for 10 weeks that was the perfect opportunity to get back on track. i wanted to see how much weight i would lose while he was gone (and as some of you know, i'm a competetive lil bitch. even if its with myself) i knew how weightwatchers worked and knew what to look for on a food label. so with all that information, i just watched what i ate (and how much of it i ate) and drank plenty of water. there was no time for exercise since i was the only one home with the kiddos.

before i knew it the weight was just melting off. by the time mike was coming home, i was down about 20 lbs.

i was so friggin' excited. especially since i knew that weight was prolly never coming back. then after being sick for a week, a week sweating and walking my ass of at disney, physical therapy for my knee, and walking almost every day,a few more pounds came off,

30+ pounds and 2 pant sizes gone!!

i then started to fall in love with what i saw in the mirror. yeah, there are still some things that i needed to work on, but there was all this wonderful stuff that i saw:

*a collar bone showing on my chest (hmmmm...never noticed that before)

*muscles bulging out of my legs (which caused me to constantly ask people if they see them)

*muscles in my arms (again, "do you see that?")

*i could see my feet much better.

this was amazing! i haven't felt this way about myself since....well, never!

so the past six months have definately been a whirlwind and all (i don't know if you guys heard about this lil rainfall we had called hurricane katrina) but it is time to get back on the wagon and lose 10 more pounds.

would i like to lose more? hell yeah, but my main goal thru all of this was to weigh under 150 pounds. that would be less then i weighed when i started at the police department (9 1/2 years ago).

so for now i am only going to focus on 10 pounds. can't be too hard eh?

now that that is all said and done, lemme give ya'll a lil hint of what you can look foward to here at "just another 10lbs":

*every tuesday will be my weigh in day. i will take a picture of what my scale shows and post it for the world to see. figured this was pretty brave and might help keep me in line when i am wanting to devour a box of dots.

*tried and true recipes that are as yummy in the tummy as they are good for the tummy.

*posts that include what i eat on any given day, how much i exercised, and how much water i drank.

*any tips i may have up my sleeve or i stole off of a website.

*and of course all my frustrations and shouts of glee throughout this whole journey.

of course i am also interested in hearing about other bloggers trials and tribulations, so if you gotta link to share or even a tip on how to keep the jujy fruits from entering my mind at any given moment, i would love to hear it.

thanks for sharing this journey with me.

i just know that the support from all of ya'll is going to help make it a success!

let the journey begin....